I’m sure that as you read that title, you were automatically thinking that this might be another Christmas post. As much as I wish it were, I am sorry to disappoint all of you Christmas lovers. This is not a Christmas post but a Christian post.
As Christians, we are called to forgive and to forgive often. In Matthew 18:21-22, Jesus tells Peter that we are to forgive those who wrong us or offend us seventy times seven. Basically, as it states in the Amplified version of the Bible—we must be ready to forgive over and over again, past counting. It’s so easy to say, but so very difficult to do, especially when our flesh is screaming otherwise. Sometimes our flesh outweighs what Jesus calls us to do, but we are to be reminded that we are to forgive others just as we ask our Father to forgive us.
Whew! When you really think of it like that…..it makes me want to put together a list of all the people that I “feel” have wronged me. I feel like I need to make a list and check it twice so I know for sure if I’ve truly forgiven them or not. Am I naughty or nice?
I began to think back on my past hurts….even the ones that didn’t seem like they could have been a big deal, so I began to make a list of all the people that may have hurt or offended me. Now, don’t go on thinking that I have this long “Grudge List”or a “Burn Book”.
Before I gave my life to Christ, I most likely had a list that would blow your mind, but by the grace of God, I have been able to forgive a lot of past hurts, people, etc. Most importantly, I’ve been able to forgive myself. I was at the top of that list because I managed to hurt and offend myself in ways that I couldn’t even begin to explain…more than anyone else on the list.
Nonetheless, no one ever said that once you become a Christian you will live life without being hurt or offended. Oftentimes, offense and hurt happen so much more, especially when it comes to other Christians because we hold them in high esteem thinking that they are supposed to be perfect. While my list was not nearly as long after I was saved, it was a list of heavy burden. Recently, my Heavenly Father had to correct me because I was guilty of placing a Christian sister on a pedestal only to be extremely disappointed and let down when she turned out not to be the perfect Christian I thought her to be. Do not think for a minute that I am implying she was a horrible person because that is far from the truth. She is a mighty woman of God. I simply mean—I was wrong by allowing offense to creep in which led to a great deal of hurt. That was my fault—I fell short—at that moment, I didn’t forgive the way Jesus tells us to forgive. It is not about what the other person says or does to hurt us that matters, it is about our ability or inability to be like Jesus in those moments that matter most. His words on the cross should ring in our ears every time we allow someone’s words or actions to hurt us, “Father forgive them, they know not what they are doing” Luke 23:34 We are all sinners and fall short.
My Father had to “take me to the woodshed” (as my husband likes to say) because I was wrong in thinking she would never disappoint me. I was wrong in thinking she was god. I was wrong in placing her on the throne, when He is the only One on the throne. Hurt people hurt people, and we should always be ready to forgive even before the hurt takes place. We should never think that because someone is a Christian, they will never hurt us. Our pastor tells us often, be ready to be offended by everyone we encounter—especially in the church, and forgive them before it even happens. If we already have a heart to forgive, then we will save ourselves from a lot of unnecessary pain. God has helped me to see that I need to look at each situation/person differently. I have to be “un-offendable” (yes, I know that isn’t a word). I have to look at each person and recognize that something is going on in their own hearts. Just because someone does or says something to hurt me, it doesn’t mean that it was “intentional”. It simply means they are hurting. Some are hurting more than others. There are times a person may think that they are delivered/healed from past hurts, but it turns out they just swept it under a rug.
“Let’s not talk about the elephant in the room.” We all see it, but if we just ignore it—maybe it will disappear. Instead of acknowledging the hurt and confronting it, each new hurt gets swept under that same rug until there’s a huge mound of hurt never addressed or dealt with. Healing has never truly happened because it is easier to sweep it under that rug. Soon enough, there’s a mound of hurt that blows up right in front of us, and it comes out as word vomit.
The next thing you know, the things that come out of your mouth is just a reflection of your own personal hurts. It is not always easy to be forgiving when someone’s word vomit can be so harsh…their words CAN really hurt, but we have to think about how our Father sees and forgives us. Think of all the times we have hurt or offended Him (not that He gets offended). Think of the times that we have made the decision to go our own way instead of trusting in His Word and promises. Think of all the times we have been disobedient. I can only imagine how many times I’ve hurt His heart, but He keeps forgiving me time and time again. No matter how many times I may have been mad at Him or said hurtful things, He keeps forgiving me and welcoming me with open arms. He’s such a good Father, and we can only strive to love the way He loves.
So, make your list and check it twice. Don’t hold unforgiveness in your heart no matter how serious the hurt may have been. Pray for every single person on your list. Pray that the Father blesses them abundantly. Pray for their healing. Pray that they come to realize that their own hurts are bleeding into their relationships with others and that is what is causing discord. Pray that they can truly see that their Father loves them even in spite of their failures or flaws. Pray that they come to realize that we love them even though they may have caused a lot of pain and strife. Pray that they can finally accept forgiveness, and they can also forgive themselves. Pray that they can finally address all the things swept under the rug as a way to complete healing. Pray that the elephant in the room is no longer ignored. Whatever it is…..Just pray for them!
A Little Bit of This and A Little Bit of That 