Category: life

change, God, growth, Lessons learned, life, Prayer, Uncategorized, Wisdom

I’m Gonna Be 50!!!!! My plans were not His plans.

Tansy

It is unbelievable as I type that statement! “I am going to be 50 years old!”

Not that I ever watched Saturday Night Live growing up, but I believe everyone has seen the Sally O’Malley skit at some point in their lives. As I look at that number—50—I can hear her voice distinctly. “I can kick, stretch, and kick because I’m 50!” Well, I am 50 in about 3 months.

I look back at the “nearly” 50 years of my life in awe, amazement, and gratitude. It is amazing to believe that I have been alive for 1/2 a century!!!!! While I don’t feel like I’m about to turn 50….the history of my life tells me otherwise. I had so many plans!

One thing that being a Christian has taught me is that we can make all the plans we want, but God’s plan and purpose will prevail.

Never in my wildest dreams would I have dreamed that I would have the life I have today. If all of my plans had turned out the way I planned, I would be a concert pianist traveling the world performing. I doubt I would have had a marriage because there would not have been time for one, and I definitely would not have time for children or anything else for that matter. I doubt I would have found myself living in Slidell, La being married to the most amazing man I have ever been blessed to meet and living the best life I could have ever imagined or prayed for.

If you have read my previous blog “Do I Have To?” , you would know that we don’t live in a large house. We don’t even own our house…we are still renters, but our home is 957 square feet, and we love every inch of it. Every Friday, we can have anywhere from 6-18 people at our church Life Group. (Don’t ask me how we manage to feed and seat that many people in our limited space, but it works out perfectly.) We don’t have luxurious vehicles, and often times we may go without a paycheck even though we are business owners. Nonetheless, this is the best life I could have ever prayed for. My husband and I are best friends, and we never argue! Rest assuredly, we don’t agree on everything, but we do not argue about those disagreements. He calls me out when I am acting like a moron, and I make sure that I do the same for him. Still, we do that for each other without arguing. I have heard so much disbelief when we tell people that. Some think that we are not telling the whole truth, but I am sure if you are around us long enough—you will understand completely. I work with my husband on a daily basis, we are on the worship team together, and we just enjoy being around each other as much as time permits. There is an unexplainable difference in your marriage when Jesus is at the center of it all. The closer you get to Jesus individually, the closer you and your spouse become. We have our individual quiet time with Jesus, but we also have time together with Jesus—outside of church activities. HE is the most important aspect of our relationship. One of the key things, is that we have learned what not to do based on all our past relationship mistakes, and we have learned how to talk to each other. One of the best things to do as a couple is go through this course “Love & Respect” by Emerson Eggerichs.

While this was not supposed to be about “How to Have a Successful Marriage” or how great my life is, I feel that I was supposed to share that for someone(s). There is hope! Life doesn’t have to be as bad as you think it is. Allow Him to make beauty from ashes.

So back to it….

You see, even amidst all of the ridiculous choices and mistakes I have ever made or ever could make, God was preparing me for this exact moment. I could sit here and contemplate on all the regret and ridicule myself for not staying on the path God had laid out for me, but He knew every single detour I would take. Sure, I could have been on His path A LOT sooner, but the lessons I have learned throughout it all has prepared me for what I am going through right now. There was overwhelming opportunities for me to choose the right path, but He already prepared the next strategy knowing I was going to make wrong decisions over and over again. He administered the same tests over and over until it was time for me to make the decision to pass them.

Have I arrived? Definitely not! I have quite a journey to go, but each and every day I am doing everything I can to follow the path He has for me.

My biggest problem, in my early adult years, was that I have always been impatient. I wanted all the things NOW. I was never one for waiting on the good stuff to happen, so I always did what I thought I was supposed to do—I would make it happen in my own strength, or at least try. I was your regular Veruca Salt…A VERY BAD EGG!

Don’t think for a minute, that I was raised that way. I was taught that if you wanted something, it took a lot of dedication and hard work. I was taught that it would take time and perseverance if you wanted to win the race. I didn’t grow up with a silver spoon, but I also didn’t lack for anything. Most of my life, I was brought up in church. I knew the principals of what God wanted, but I didn’t understand the walk nor the relationship. This attitude of impatience was of my own doing and of my own demise.

Throughout my early adult life, aside from impatience, I developed several negative traits. While I could go through all of them, I doubt you want to read a novel at this point. I am going to focus on one of the biggest negative traits (which seems to be a common one amongst the masses)….drama!

I was the type of person that thrived on drama. If I didn’t have it in my life….it felt like I was missing something. I don’t know exactly when this “need” developed, and I am not blaming anyone for it either…it was just a trait I developed. When I graduated high school, cell phones weren’t the popular thing nor social media. We didn’t even have dial up nor the internet because it just wasn’t the popular thing—at least not in my circles. Keep in mind, I am about to turn 50! Nonetheless, drama became a leading lady in my life. No matter where I turned she was there, and when she wasn’t—I searched for her. It was there throughout my first try at my college career, during my break from my college career, after I returned to college my college career for the second time, during any relationship I had, during my first two marriages, and all the things in between. I never realized how draining it really was and the type of person it made me out to be.

I had to be at center stage every possible moment. I had to be the one that was always breaking down emotionally because it meant that the spotlight was on me. If someone hurt me—I upstaged them with my role as victim. If I hurt someone—I managed to upstage them and play the victim role even then. It was addictive to be in the spotlight. It didn’t matter if I was active in the church or not….I was always the leading lady in the next drama series. I’d pretend to be this perfect individual who had it all put together while I was dealing with my church friends, but then I had a different life on the outside of that….one filled with drama. Life was a stage to me—always performing.

After I surrendered my life, I didn’t have a need for drama. It was like the void I had in my spirit was suddenly full. But you see, the enemy is deceitful and conniving. Somehow, he managed to put the right person, situation, or whatever you want to call it, in my life to suck me back in to a dramatic role. So have I arrived? Not by any means! I was sucked back into it. If you read my previous blog “It’s Time To Make a List and Check It Twice”, you will understand what I mean when I say that I allowed it to happen. The bitterness, offense, unforgiveness, etc. It was all wrapped up in a pretty package so I could make myself think that I was the victim once again. I thank God everyday that He brought me back to the path He has for me.

There is so much peace that fills your soul when you decide to walk away from drama and all the mess that comes with it. Sometimes the enemy will try to entice you with people and situations that may reflect some of your own past negative traits that may have brought you a sense of comfort at one time in your life. Sometimes we may find ourselves flocking to those people because it is a familiar spirit. But that’s just it—it is a familiar spirit, not the Holy Spirit. Unfortunately, because of those familiar spirits, sometimes it causes havoc and the smart thing to do is to walk away.

Just today, the daily devotion was about praying for those who persecute us. There is so much peace when you make the decision to love them and pray for them. Pray with every ounce of sincerity you have that God blesses them. We are called to love like Jesus loves, and while it seems we should be friends with everyone, and they should be in our inner circles—sometimes they are only in our lives for a season. Sometimes that season has to come to an end. It doesn’t mean that we don’t love them, but not everyone will be by your side all throughout your life. I am thankful for the time that I’ve had with every single person that has been a part of my almost 50 years of life. While you might think that I am only talking about the positive relationships, I am even thankful for the people in which we may have parted on bad terms. I have learned much from the downfall of those relationships, and the role that I played in its failure. To those people, I am truly sorry for the role that I played. I’ve been able to walk away with many life lessons from every single person.

My cup is overflowing when I look back on every year of my life—the people, the lessons, the joys, the sorrows, the pain, the laughs, the heartaches, the shenanigans (even the ones we don’t speak of), the tests, and so much more. I could not have asked for a better way to live out my first 1/2 century of my life. Thank you to every single one of you for being a part of my story. I am excited to see what God does with this next chapter.

change, forgiveness, God, growth, life, Persecution, Prayer, Uncategorized

It’s time to make a list and check it twice—gotta find out if I’m naughty or nice.

Tansy

I’m sure that as you read that title, you were automatically thinking that this might be another Christmas post. As much as I wish it were, I am sorry to disappoint all of you Christmas lovers. This is not a Christmas post but a Christian post.

As Christians, we are called to forgive and to forgive often. In Matthew 18:21-22, Jesus tells Peter that we are to forgive those who wrong us or offend us seventy times seven. Basically, as it states in the Amplified version of the Bible—we must be ready to forgive over and over again, past counting. It’s so easy to say, but so very difficult to do, especially when our flesh is screaming otherwise. Sometimes our flesh outweighs what Jesus calls us to do, but we are to be reminded that we are to forgive others just as we ask our Father to forgive us.

Whew! When you really think of it like that…..it makes me want to put together a list of all the people that I “feel” have wronged me. I feel like I need to make a list and check it twice so I know for sure if I’ve truly forgiven them or not. Am I naughty or nice?

I began to think back on my past hurts….even the ones that didn’t seem like they could have been a big deal, so I began to make a list of all the people that may have hurt or offended me. Now, don’t go on thinking that I have this long “Grudge List”or a “Burn Book”.

(I’m pretty certain most everyone knows the Mean Girls reference here.)

Before I gave my life to Christ, I most likely had a list that would blow your mind, but by the grace of God, I have been able to forgive a lot of past hurts, people, etc. Most importantly, I’ve been able to forgive myself. I was at the top of that list because I managed to hurt and offend myself in ways that I couldn’t even begin to explain…more than anyone else on the list.

Nonetheless, no one ever said that once you become a Christian you will live life without being hurt or offended. Oftentimes, offense and hurt happen so much more, especially when it comes to other Christians because we hold them in high esteem thinking that they are supposed to be perfect. While my list was not nearly as long after I was saved, it was a list of heavy burden. Recently, my Heavenly Father had to correct me because I was guilty of placing a Christian sister on a pedestal only to be extremely disappointed and let down when she turned out not to be the perfect Christian I thought her to be. Do not think for a minute that I am implying she was a horrible person because that is far from the truth. She is a mighty woman of God. I simply mean—I was wrong by allowing offense to creep in which led to a great deal of hurt. That was my fault—I fell short—at that moment, I didn’t forgive the way Jesus tells us to forgive. It is not about what the other person says or does to hurt us that matters, it is about our ability or inability to be like Jesus in those moments that matter most. His words on the cross should ring in our ears every time we allow someone’s words or actions to hurt us, “Father forgive them, they know not what they are doing” Luke 23:34 We are all sinners and fall short.

My Father had to “take me to the woodshed” (as my husband likes to say) because I was wrong in thinking she would never disappoint me. I was wrong in thinking she was god. I was wrong in placing her on the throne, when He is the only One on the throne. Hurt people hurt people, and we should always be ready to forgive even before the hurt takes place. We should never think that because someone is a Christian, they will never hurt us. Our pastor tells us often, be ready to be offended by everyone we encounter—especially in the church, and forgive them before it even happens. If we already have a heart to forgive, then we will save ourselves from a lot of unnecessary pain. God has helped me to see that I need to look at each situation/person differently. I have to be “un-offendable” (yes, I know that isn’t a word). I have to look at each person and recognize that something is going on in their own hearts. Just because someone does or says something to hurt me, it doesn’t mean that it was “intentional”. It simply means they are hurting. Some are hurting more than others. There are times a person may think that they are delivered/healed from past hurts, but it turns out they just swept it under a rug.

“Let’s not talk about the elephant in the room.” We all see it, but if we just ignore it—maybe it will disappear. Instead of acknowledging the hurt and confronting it, each new hurt gets swept under that same rug until there’s a huge mound of hurt never addressed or dealt with. Healing has never truly happened because it is easier to sweep it under that rug. Soon enough, there’s a mound of hurt that blows up right in front of us, and it comes out as word vomit.

The next thing you know, the things that come out of your mouth is just a reflection of your own personal hurts. It is not always easy to be forgiving when someone’s word vomit can be so harsh…their words CAN really hurt, but we have to think about how our Father sees and forgives us. Think of all the times we have hurt or offended Him (not that He gets offended). Think of the times that we have made the decision to go our own way instead of trusting in His Word and promises. Think of all the times we have been disobedient. I can only imagine how many times I’ve hurt His heart, but He keeps forgiving me time and time again. No matter how many times I may have been mad at Him or said hurtful things, He keeps forgiving me and welcoming me with open arms. He’s such a good Father, and we can only strive to love the way He loves.

So, make your list and check it twice. Don’t hold unforgiveness in your heart no matter how serious the hurt may have been. Pray for every single person on your list. Pray that the Father blesses them abundantly. Pray for their healing. Pray that they come to realize that their own hurts are bleeding into their relationships with others and that is what is causing discord. Pray that they can truly see that their Father loves them even in spite of their failures or flaws. Pray that they come to realize that we love them even though they may have caused a lot of pain and strife. Pray that they can finally accept forgiveness, and they can also forgive themselves. Pray that they can finally address all the things swept under the rug as a way to complete healing. Pray that the elephant in the room is no longer ignored. Whatever it is…..Just pray for them!

change, flowers, God, growth, life, Uncategorized

Do I Have To?!?!?!

Tansy

(WARNING—Major photo dump in this post.)

It is January 22nd!!!! Is Christmas REALLY over? I mean after all, we just had a massive “snow-mageddon” here in Deep South Louisiana. To me that still screams Christmas. When I say that I have been praying for a White Christmas….I am not exaggerating in any way. We have taken winter trips to Tennessee for that last 4 years because I wanted to TRULY experience REAL snow. Sure, I’ve experienced a tiny bit of snow both in south and north Louisiana, but nothing to truly write about in the books. We just returned from our Gatlinburg vacation this past Friday, and I was pretty excited because I was finally able to experience real snow on this trip. It was absolutely gorgeous! We ended up not getting as much as the meteorologists predicted, but it was more than I’ve seen in quite some time. It made me feel like all the Christmas feels were finally complete. To my surprise, after we came home, we ended up experiencing a record-breaking snow storm in south Louisiana. I have NEVER experienced snow like this! My Christmas prayer was answered not just once, but twice, and in a very big way!!!! So now I ask…..do I have to?!?! Do I really have to take my Christmas decorations down?

We were stuck in our cabin in Gatlinburg for a day and then ventured out to take in the sights. And then being stuck in our own home for a few days…..having all of the Christmas decorations up just made everything so Christmas-Cozy!

All of this snow just makes me want to leave everything up for that much longer.

I decorate our 957 square foot home entirely in Christmas decor. If I can fit it….I will decorate. This year, as usual, I did more than the previous year. I have been decorating with a Gingerbread theme for a while now, but this was the first year that I emphasized pastel colors over the red, green, and browns. Since we changed our area rugs, it made more sense to concentrate on pastels.

Of course after Christmas, my husband installed some of my Christmas gifts, so here is the after Christmas pictures.

I love our small kitchen, but now that our church Life Group is growing, I am beginning to realize that my small space could be a little larger. Nonetheless, we are making it work as long as we are here.

As I said before, we changed our area rugs, so pastel colors were the emphasis. Our living room went from neutrals to a pastel wonderland. (I secretly want a pink sofa, but we have leather couches since it is easier to clean up spills—we tend to have an overflow of guests every Friday. Accidents happen—leather is easy to clean.)

Our small dining room has taken on a huge transformation as opposed to years past. I ended up throwing in decor ideas I’ve used in previous drama productions. I have more ideas for next year, but this is what it looks like this year. The last picture is the wreath I made for our front door.

Naturally, I also had to decorate our bedroom and the one bathroom we have.

Last year I decided that I wanted to decorate a Grinch themed tree for Christmas this year, and the only place I had to put it was in our spare bedroom. It definitely does not match that bedroom’s decor, but at least I was able to do it. I also had a sudden urge to decorate a Nutcracker Ballet themed tree which I put in my office at work. Next year the Nutcracker Ballet tree will go in my spare room, and the Grinch tree will go up at the office. I wish I had thought of that sooner, but there’s always next year. The next group of pictures are of the trees I decorated this year. (Not just for my home.)

I do believe that my favorite tree this year is the Nutcracker Ballet themed tree. Perhaps it is because I’m partial to pink, but I love the uniqueness of the ornaments and the spinning ballerina tree topper.

I also started making wreaths this year and will continue that endeavor throughout the year. Perhaps that will fill the void of the missing Christmas decorations after I do decide to take them down.

On a side note, in the middle of all of the Christmas decorating, I was able to decorate for my oldest nephew’s rehearsal dinner. It has been a very busy Christmas season, but the blessings have been abundant.

I am looking forward to all that God has planned for me this next year. It is very exciting as He reveals some of the plans He has in store already. But…..the real question is……DO I REALLY HAVE TO?!?! Do I REALLY have to take down all of the Christmas decorations?!?!

change, disney, flowers, gardening, God, growth, life, Uncategorized

Change…It’s Inevitable…It Causes Growth.

Tansy

Since I gave up my love for Disney, it has caused me to think about change in a huge sort of way. If you are wondering why I made such a decision, please read my previous blog. I must admit that giving up Disney caused me to go into a mild state of sadness for a bit. It was almost comparable to a bad break up. Like a bad breakup, the after effects of your life require change. Change is inevitable when something you love is removed or subtracted from your life…you are forced to look at things differently. You are forced to look at life in “some” sort of way. Of course, you can choose to die (in a dramatic sense, of course), but that is not a direction I would ever choose because there is so much more to life. Besides, my break up with Disney was not THAT heart breaking. Unfortunately, it still felt like I lost a loved one. Nonetheless, the only direction I choose is to grow. How can you grow from what you thought was the “Happiest Place on Earth”?

Since we moved into the home we live in, I have taken every step to make our house a home. Every room is decorated and brings a certain amount of cheer to our home. People have often commented that no one could be depressed in our house. It is flooded with lots of color, flowers (fake of course), and inviting comfort.

However, the outside of the house has always been neglected because it was never taken care of to begin with. Sure, we have a yard guy, but all he is responsible for is mowing and trimming the grass. He will trim the shrubs upon request, but that is the extent of his duties. Needless to say, there are numerous areas of the yard that look like a wooded forest. It also has its fair share of poison oak and thorny vines. These are not exciting things to deal with. Nonetheless, in order to get the yard to look beautiful, one has to start somewhere. Right? So, I’ve taken up gardening. I suppose I felt that I needed to do something that would allow me to bring some beauty and joy into my life since my breakup.

The funny thing about this change is that I AM NOT A GARDENER!!!! I have killed so many plants in my lifetime (hence the reason I have fake flowers in our home—I can’t kill those). However, I am determined that our yard will one day look breathtakingly beautiful. For those of you that know me, you know that this is a huge feat for me because I am NOT the “outdoorsy” type of person. Y’all…I hate the outdoors! Being fair skinned has caused this love-hate relationship with the sun. Unfortunately, in order to get our yard in a beautiful state…there are sacrifices that need to be made. It is a very slow process, but at least I am making some progress. I have a vision….hopefully everything grows into that vision.

So let’s begin with the transformation. We removed the half dead box hedges in front of the house and replaced them with azalea bushes.

In addition to the azaleas, we also planted some knockout roses and gardenia bushes in front of the house. On the front sides of the house, we have some New Dawn climbing roses (that are obviously not climbing yet). We also added an arbor to the front and planted yellow climbing roses on each side.

Yellow Knockout Roses
This New Dawn was constantly chopped, unknowingly, by our yard guy. It’s protected now.
This one was spared more often than the other. However now they are both about to upgrade to climbing status, so we are in the market for a trellis to add to each side of the house.
The yellow climbing rose bush produces the most vibrant yellow rose. So far we’ve only had one, but they started from nothing. I am definitely looking forward to when they begin to climb across the arbor.
The chopped bushes you see were trimmed and weeded. They were overtaken by thorny vines, and they had grown entirely too tall. They made it quite difficult to see anyone on the sidewalk whenever we would pull out of the driveway. This was definitely a “safety” trim more than anything.

Since we moved in, there were some shrubs on the right side of the house. We requested our yard guy to trim them, and he did. Little did we know that the only thing that was growing on those “dead” shrubs were thorny vines that strangled them to death. Those were cut down, and now we are in the process of planting more Bridal Wreath shrubs on the side of the house instead. I know these grow to become most beautiful, so I cannot wait to see them mature.

I’ve always dreamed of having beautiful hydrangeas creating a pathway to the front entrance. So, we planted a few hydrangea shrubs. Although they started out as multicolored, our soil has turned them completely pink. My goal is for them to be multicolored, so the soil will be getting the nutrients it needs to make that possible.

This pathway is definitely a project that is in progress. It will take some time before it looks the way I intend it to look. At least this is a great start.

There are many corners of the yard that has shrubs and trees that have taken over and just looks like a forresty (I know that’s not a word.) mess. It is definitely not a task that can be done in one day. We did tackle one of the front corners of the fence that could have caused us to kill someone because it completely prevented us from being able to see anyone walking along the sidewalk.

That particular corner of the fence near the entrance/exit of our driveway was covered with some sort of thicket that was so ridiculously overgrown it reminded me of the thicket the Maleficent surrounded the castle with to prevent the Prince from finding Sleeping Beauty. (Okay, okay….just because I gave up Disney doesn’t mean I refrain from using the stories as analogies.) The picture here only shows a portion of how this thicket looked.

It was so thick and unruly that it actually grew into the fence. Besides that, it was infested with thorny vines and poison oak. We managed to get rid of most of it. Some of the branches are completely grown around the wire of the fence that it would take an act of congress to remove it. We are still trying to figure that part out. However, it has been cleared, and we now have another climbing rose bush. This one has yet to produce anything, but they are supposed to be orange in color. Like the yellow rose bushes, they too started from nothing.
So in addition to all of the bushy hazards we had in the front yard, we have a huge eye sore.
I am hoping that these daisies take over enough to camouflage the eye sore. If they don’t, I may have to try something else.

So that basically takes care of the front yard. We have a small portion of the backyard that is fenced in. About 2 years ago, we were trying to incorporate a raised garden behind the house, but it was an epic failure. So basically it has been sitting there with a few of my herbs that have been planted ever since and seem to thrive without my help. It also has marigolds that I planted when we first put it together. Now these marigolds are three years old. That is quite odd to me because I didn’t think they were supposed to come back. Nonetheless, they are in their third year (even after I pulled them out). I also threw a bunch of wildflower seeds in the raised garden and they are finally coming up. What I am starting to see is absolutely beautiful, so I cannot wait to see the rest.

A friend of ours gave us a few tomato plants. When I planted them a few weeks ago, they were just a few inches tall. They seem to be doing rather well, and it looks like I will have to support them very soon.

We also have two blueberry bushes that have been planted there for three years now. I was extremely excited one day when we came back from prayer because one of them is now infested (obviously this use of infested is in a good way) with blueberries.

We also have two strawberry plants that are producing rather nicely. So, I believe that I am pretty pleased with the way our raised garden is turning out. It is finally coming alive. My lavender has also decided to come back.

Clearly you can see that I have moved on from interior design, and I am trying to bring as much color outside as I have inside. While it is very simple to keep up artificial flowers, it is such a wonderful thing to see God’s creations bloom right in front of your eyes. I pray everyday that I don’t kill what He has created, and that He gives me the wisdom to know how to take care of it all. My neighbor is really amazing at taking care of flowers, so I just pray that I can do half as well as she does. She definitely has a gift.

As for me, I am completely out of my comfort zone, and I am trying to learn new things. Never be afraid to try something new. God has so many amazing things planned for our lives, but we have to be open to change. Often times in order for us to grow, we NEED to change. We need to fertilize our minds with new knowledge and water the seeds that He has already planted within us. Bloom where you are planted, and never stay dormant. Change is inevitable….it will cause growth.

life, planning, time management

Time = Priorities

Tansy

TIME…I’m sure many won’t have the time to read this…..

We often get wrapped up in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives that we tend to resort to the phrase, “I don’t have enough time.”

Out of all the excuses in the world, the one I detest most is also the one I seem to hear most frequently – I don’t have time. Sadly, I’ve heard those very words spew from my own mouth. I don’t have time to learn a new language, I don’t have time to workout and get fit, I don’t have time to start a business, I don’t have time to do this, that, or anything else.

Think of everyone who has ever achieved greatness throughout the entire span of human history – Archimedes, Michelangelo, Shakespeare, Ford, Jobs and anyone else you can think of who was successful – do you know how many hours they had to work with in a day? Twenty four. Same as you and me.

Not only am I going to explain why it’s an inane excuse, I’m going to show you ways you can ‘find the time’ to do everything you could possibly want to do and more. There are 24 Hours in a Day…So how is it, exactly, that you don’t have enough time?

So clearly, ‘finding the time’ is not the issue. If Michelangelo can find the time to paint the Sistine Chapel, I’m reasonably certain we can find the time to workout three times a week, call our parents, put in a few minutes posting about our home businesses, cook a healthy dinner, spend time with your family, call your parents, and most importantly…spend time with Jesus.

I get that some of you may think I’m being too literal. You don’t mean the hours aren’t there….you’re just too busy‘. Fine.

Perhaps we need a lesson or two at managing our time.

People love to say they’re too busy like it’s some kind of insurmountable, external obstacle that they are in no way culpable for, as it’s clearly dictated by forces beyond their control. It makes them feel like it’s not their fault for not trying to do whatever it is they wish they could do. It basically externalizes responsibility.

I believe fear plays a huge role in why we make excuses about not having enough time

I think many people are just too terrified to fail so they’d rather stay stagnant where it’s comfortable rather than try. In reality we should embrace failure because it is definitely not something we should be afraid of.

If you are someone, however, who honestly feels like you don’t have enough time to accomplish the things you want to accomplish, then sit down one day and write out everything you did for every hour of the day up to that point. You can even go through and list everything you did that whole week if you’re feeling ambitious. Jot down how many times you checked Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Tik Tok, etc. I realized that if I actually posted a brief post about my home based business everytime I checked Facebook or Instagram, then I’m not completely wasting my time on social media because posting is a crucial part of my job to share the amazing products my business has to offer. Jot down how often you find your mind just wandering off as if you have lost focus for a period of time during the day….you find yourself doing things that really don’t matter in the bigger picture. Jot down how many episodes of your favorite series you are watching in a day, a week, a month, etc. Jot down how many times you log on to your online games each day. Will a half hour of Candy Crush or Texas Hold ‘Em (I’m not exactly sure what’s the latest and greatest online games these days.) here and there actually get you where you want to be in life? Will watching 30 minutes of YouTube help you achieve the bigger picture in life? No, probably not. Add up all that time that was squandered, and you are sure to find a few extra hours in your day that you could have applied to working your business, spending time with loved ones, making some extra money to help you get out of debt, etc.

This is the precise reason I started planning because I was always complaining about not having enough time. People have laughed at me because part of my “to do” list everyday is 1. Make bed 2. Clean kitchen 3. Organize my day. The truth is, if I don’t write everything down for my day, I do tend to skip over many things because I get caught up in everything else….often times, things that don’t really matter in the bigger scheme of things. Sticking with schedules has really been helping me. After listing my morning routine for so long—now I can simplify it to “Morning Routine”, and I know all the things that must be done before I head out the door. I’ve also found certain things that I can do before I go to bed, so in the end I have more time in the mornings to get other things done. So, in my planner, I mark down for each day “nightly routine”. My nightly routine has helped me and is helping me to accomplish so much more every single day. I know that by sticking to a nightly routine, I have made that time for myself in the morning to spend time worshiping and praying so I can have the most important relationship in my life…my relationship with Christ. If I don’t have that…nothing else really matters anyway, right?

When I began to work on my Masters, I was juggling work, family life, and school. I began to become highly stressed because not only was I going to school, but I was also teaching high school, I was the director of a very active choral and drama program, and I was also married (My relationship with Jesus was not a priority at the time…although, I did hold a job as a church music director. It was simply for appearance purposes if I am being blatantly honest.). Nonetheless, I did not know how to juggle all of it, and it took a toll on my marriage because I was making everything else a priority. Of course, I made the excuses that my spouse didn’t understand, wasn’t supportive, asked entirely too much of me, etc. I didn’t know how to plan. Lack of planning was the root of my downfall. After failing at so many things, my job, my relationship, etc. I took up “planning”. I developed a habit of sitting at my desk and planning my entire week. At first, I was one of those people that liked to decorate my planner (scrapbooking, in a sense)—it was much needed therapy at the time. After failing at so much, one tends to need a bit of therapy to work through it all (especially when you don’t have Jesus). I have now become the planner that simply writes things down (I no longer decorate—it is no longer a priority.). I have been using planners for quite some time now, and I have achieved great success from it.

This is only 5 of the 7 planners during my 7 year planning time. I keep them because there are monumental things in them that I like to reflect on.

Before I began to plan, I had an excuse for every failure. Honestly, when we face the truth of the matter, we can never say that we can’t do this, or it isn’t working out, if we are not investing time into it. Basically, instead of saying we don’t have time for something, we are actually saying, “It’s not a priority.” “I don’t have time to spend worshiping and praying each day” becomes “Developing a relationship with Christ just isn’t important to me.” “I don’t have time to spend time with my spouse because I have so much other stuff to do” becomes “My marriage is not a priority.” (God knows I’ve used that excuse in my previous marriage. I don’t have time to work out” becomes “Working out and becoming healthier is not a priority.” “I don’t have time to work my home based business” becomes “Building my home based business, so I can get out of debt isn’t a priority.” Often times we say we are going to do something or be a part of something, and we get involved on paper, but that’s it. We don’t invest time into those things…..maybe it is your relationship with Christ, your marriage, a relationship, education, your home business, your daily job, etc. We simply sit there and expect things to happen without putting in any effort at all. Of course, when we fail at those things, it’s always easy to say, “I didn’t have enough time.” We can’t ever blame someone else for our lack of relationship with Christ, our failed marriage, failed business, dropping out of school, etc. We can’t ever complain about our failures, nor can we blame anyone else for our failures if we have not put in the time and effort. It comes down to what we choose to make a priority and the time we invest in those things that are important to us. Each day is a new day, a brand new page in your book of life. What are you writing on that page today? Say this every single day…..”I Create My Life.” The best part about it all is that when we put our relationship with Christ first….for some reason everything else just seems to fall into place so much easier. What are your priorities in life? Are you still making excuses by claiming to not have enough time? Are you still blaming “time” for your failures? What can you do to accomplish your goals? Does your time management need improvement?

Manage your time wisely, and just watch all the amazing things you will begin to accomplish. It all starts with a plan. Peace and Blessings!

Now, go find your time and seize the day! Create your life.